Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Loss and Gain

In 2001 I lost both kidneys, I was very scared not know what was up and what was down; but within me a fire began to burn.  I learned not to take life for granted and to savor every experince that is given to you.  Most people dot realize that little miricales surround us, people move so fast that the forget the beutay and simplicity of divine creation.   Like watering a plant and listening to the water rush and watching bead down from one leaf to the next.  Today I held a rose up to my face and felt its velvety petals, smelled its rich persume and slowly seperated each petal to save for another experince.  Working with that flower became a magical experince.  Just stopping to smell the roses, can change your day.
I was always the child who needed to look at every plant, rock and shell I came across and ponder with such wonder and awe, but after kidney failure I realized how it came alive.  It did not talk to me, but it spoke to me.   Stopping and looking at the stars with childlike wonderment, smelling the honeysuckle like each time was my first time and hugging someone like I could feel their soul in me. This is when the world became magical to me, when my mundane world fractued and I realized the fragilty of all things even within myself.
So now I listen to everyones story, feel the skin of an apple peel, and look at the world with wonderment.  This embracement of the world connected me with God, and opened my eyes to so much beauty.  I lost a life that I was expected to have and gained a marriage withe the divine.  It has helped me to connect and try to help so many people and as I heal them I slowly begin to heal myself. Ase Doc Hava

3 comments:

  1. This is really touching and inspiring.

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  2. As many people look outside for that sense of joy and wonderment, it is truly a gift to be able to see it all around you. You bless those around you by sharing that give of outlook :)

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  3. When I was younger, I was very daydreamy and could spend huge amounts of time, staring/contemplating little bits of the world. I was easily amused. As people expect you more to conform, and be an adult who can hold a job, I lost more and more of my world, until I claimed it back, or as much as I was able. When I am able to make myself slowdown, and not multitask, the magick opens back up. let one piece of chocolate melt in your mouth, and then kiss someone.

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